Exciting. Intriguing. Startling. And that was just the commercials before last night's draft got under way. And then things shifted to Warp Factor 10 and we were off on the wildest ride in the pigskin universe in many a year.
Sure, the Titans will have a more solid offensive line after adding Michigan standout tackle Tayler Lewan. But will they rue the move if Jake Locker continues to be as fragile as a Faberge egg? Yes, the Vikings badly needed a defensive boost, and will almost certainly get it from UCLA linebacker Anthony Barr. But if their quarterback situation continues to resemble a revolving door, will they regret not rolling the dice on Johnny?
And Dallas - of all people, the Cowboys, with their penchant for looking for star power - also passed on The Passer who many thought would fit Jerry Jones' outfit like the proverbial glove, even allowing for their continued current investment in Tony Romo.
Crazy calls?
So, if Cleveland were the literal talk of the town, who else made all the right moves, while which teams were this year's footballing fools?
Well, it's probably no surprise at all to hear that most pundits were left scratching their heads at the 16th choice, which belonged to the Cowboys and limelight hound Jones. If ever there was a moment for the Dallas owner to seize the (first) day, it was with Manziel still on the board, along with a wealth of other offensive and defensive talent.
For Jones then to come up with Notre Dame offensive lineman Zack Martin - with all the challenges Romo had last season, while his defence was not so much an Achilles heel as an Achilles leg - is something that Texas football scribes will be working on for months to come. And, unless the Cowboys end their three-year run of play-off futility, you can bet this choice will resound in Valley Ranch with the boo birds.
Detroit are also firmly under the footballing question mark after reaching for North Carolina tight end Eric Ebron at No.10. They certainly need an upgrade at this key pass-catching position, but few observers thought Ebron worth taking this high. By the same token, Chicago's pick of cornerback Kyle Fuller was at the very least an eyebrow raiser.
He can certainly make the Bears' secondary stronger next time out but that wouldn't be difficult. And, when Marc Trestman's defence had all the run-stopping potency of wet toilet paper last year, surely they would have been better off with a run-stuffing lineman or linebacker? It's arguable that Michigan State's Darqueze Dennard - who slipped as far as a delighted Cincinnati at 24 - would have been a better bet than Fuller as his tackling ability was notably more prominent in 2013.
On the other side of the coin, Buffalo earned many plaudits for their bold swoop for wideout Watkins, a player rated as NFL-ready from the get-go in 2014. And the poor old Raiders confounded many by refusing to pass up on the chance to land a Mack truck for their linebacking corps. There should be some hesitant running backs willing to get to the second level of the Oakland D next time around and, while Dennis Allen's team still has many gaping holes to fill, this most assuredly means he has one less to worry about.
Of course, there was also the cojones exhibited by the Jaguars, who stated loud and clear that they think UCF quarterback Bortles is the next passing fancy, well ahead of both Manziel and Louisville's Teddy Bridgewater, who Minnesota snatched with a last-minute trade at No.32 with Seattle.
Many pundits felt we could see at least four passers get picked on the first night but, as it happened, there were almost only two.
Predictable surprises
And, having mentioned the pundits and those draft-board prognosticators, it really wasn't a stellar night for those who make a living at this kind of thing (which was pretty much what I had been saying for the past few weeks).
Mssrs Kiper and McShay had devoted fully 11 mock draft scenarios to predicting how things would all shake out once The Commish said 'Go!' But, after successfully sending Jadeveon Clowney to Houston and Greg Robinson to the Rams, things quickly unravelled for the terrible twosome.
True, they DID fruitfully nominate almost three quarters of the first-round names, but they matched up just FIVE players with the right teams in that 32, which isn't much of a success rate (barely 15%) after four months of boring us rigid with their mock version 1.0, 2.0, 3.0, etc.
Still, Clowney will not be arguing. Having wiped away his tears, he can now see his way to a multi-million dollar Houston future and the chance to team up with JJ Watt and form the most formidable defensive line since the third century BC, when Chinese Emperor Qin Shi Huang said, "This wall you have in mind, how long can you make it?"
And, if Houston still go 2-14 in 2014, I promise to give up this mickey-taking football mullarkey and get a REAL job.
