Salomon Kalou claims he was told he would not play in Chelsea's first team under Andre Villas-Boas after being cast as a contract rebel.
The Ivory Coast international's current deal expires in the summer and it was previously reported West Ham would make a move for the forward if they were promoted.
But in the wake of scoring Chelsea's winner against Benfica in Lisbon in the UEFA Champions League on Tuesday night, Kalou wants to stay at Stamford Bridge.
Having made just four starts in all competitions before Villas-Boas was sacked at the beginning of March, though, there was a stage when the 26-year-old's mind was less clear.
"Maybe Andre was building a new team and he was maybe thinking I wasn't part of the future of the club," said Kalou, a 2006 signing from Feyenoord, in the Evening Standard.
"I had been told that because I didn't sign the contract I was not allowed to play.
"It has been a hard season not playing. As a player, you want to get involved more, you want to help the team to win and also for yourself.
"You want to score more goals and show you're a better player than people think.
"If you don't get on the pitch, it is very hard to show that every weekend.
"I feel like maybe sometimes the club never gave me the opportunity to show what I can do. That is a really big frustration."