The cheek of it
Bumble on Jonathan Trott's time-wasting, Hove's cheeky girls and a chance to meet one of his heroes.
Last Updated: 02/06/10 5:29pm
I've been shouting it out loud for a little while now, but England are looking very strong in all departments.
We've got wicket-keeper-batsmen coming out of our ears, the cupboard's not bare when it comes to batting, we've got loads of fast bowlers and a world-class spinner. We're doing okay.
It was a predictable victory against Bangladesh on an excellent Lord's pitch. They could play on that pitch for a fortnight and nothing much would happen.
The proof in the pudding there is that Graeme Swann didn't take a wicket. It reminded me of the not-too-recent past when we'd go into a Lord's Test match with no spinner.
But Steven Finn was excellent and it's very exciting that a 21-year-old could be centre-stage.
Ryan Sidebottom replaces the injured Tim Bresnan at Old Trafford, even though I had a sneaky feeling they might call up Sajid Mahmood.
We lacked a little bit of penetration at Lord's and Mahmood has a bit of extra pace. It would have been a bit of a punt, but he has been scoring a few runs, which England like from their bowlers.
But Sidebottom has got the nod and maybe the selectors are looking for a left-arm over bowler with Australia in mind. They've got Mitchell Johnson and Doug Bollinger and that gives a little bit of something for Swann to bowl into.
Anyway, the bottom line is the selectors and Andy Flower fancy Sidebottom and I hope we get a quick, bouncy pitch for him at Old Trafford.
Failing to wrap up warm
The t20 season started on Tuesday and despite the freezing cold weather, it was nearly a full house. There was a great atmosphere despite the damp conditions.
It certainly wasn't the right weather for those young ladies with almost no clothes on. That was the spectacle of the night.
My producer warned me off making any comment. I was all ready to go: 'That's cheeky' and such. Mind-boggling, it was.
I ended up travelling home on the 5.23am train from Brighton. I had no choice. The wife said I had to put the bins out.
On Wednesday I'm off to Accrington to wish my grand-daughter a happy birthday and I'll be taking part in Regiment manoeuvres in the Hesketh in the evening.
Then it's off to Old Trafford for the second Test
We're expecting a few special guests to turn up for the Test match.
Early Doors fans should tune in on Friday because James Quinn (the bent policeman, Phil) and John Henshaw (landlord Ken) will be coming along. You might recognise John from the Post Office advert with Roger Moore.
Ed Blaney from my favourite band The Fall is coming on Sunday and there's a possibility that Mark E Smith will turn up as well. It would be nice if he did.
I'd love to have him in the commentary box... but with his reputation that might be a bit of risk.
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HOW SLOW CAN YOU GO?
Regarding Trott's mannerisms it is a simple matter of the umpires ducking their responsibility to the bowlers and the audience. His batting is, mostly, admirable. I, for one do not pay to see the irritating, time-wasting, bi-polar behaviour. I pay to see cricket, not the psychological impediments and the coping strategy of one with an obsessive compulsive disorder. As a South African born England supporter, I say "get rid of him if the authorities can't (or won't) control him". But I first demand that they do something about it. Sincerely, Mervyn Rosenberg
BUMBLE SAYS: We were getting many e-mails into the Sky commentary box complaining about this very point. The time-wasting law is very clear. It states that when the bowler is at the end of his run-up, the batsman has to be ready. It's not a complicated rule and it needs to be adhered to.
Personally I would add another line to that law: "... and the bowler is within his rights to bowl". Then any team facing Jonathan Trott could bowl spin off three or four paces and not allow him to do all that. At the moment he's getting under the skin of the opposition and he's slowing the game down. I'm a champion of umpires, but I've not seen anybody hurrying him up and applying the laws. Put it this way, if the non-striking batsman wandered down the pitch to chat to his partner the umpire would soon bring him back. This is exactly the same.
Start the Car!
Finally, a reminder that my new book called Start the Car: The World According to Bumble - is now available in hardback, on CD and as a download.
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