Daniel Vettori has admitted he feared for his career during an eight-month injury lay-off which will end on Friday.
The former New Zealand captain has not played international cricket since September's World Twenty20 tournament.
An Achilles problem restricted Vettori to barely any domestic action during that time, and Friday's first one-day international against England at Lord's will be the spin bowler's first 50-over game for New Zealand since 2011.
He said: "It's nice to be back with the team and to play some cricket, I hope. It's been a while.
"I've only bowled a couple of times in domestic games as well, so there's a little bit of trepidation going into it. But I'm looking forward to it."
Asked whether he had considered retirement, Vettori said: "Yes, I think so, you contemplate it. But I hope I'm still youngish, and can get a few more years out.
"When you're away from the game, it probably rejuvenates your love of it and you actually want to get back into it.
"I need to get through this and go from there. But I'd love to play Test matches again.
"I got through a lot of training in India, and then a club game recently. But it's not the same. I'd love to have a bit more of a build-up, but it is what it is."
Vettori, 34, is in the squad for the ICC Champions Trophy which follows on the back of a three-match ODI series against England.
"It's the best preparation we could possibly have, playing three one-dayers here," he said. "While we want to win against England, I think you do look towards that Champions Trophy."